The pointless stories of Xiaolin Showdown
by nytheprincess
Summary: The title explains it all. Total random pointlessness and no way to stop me. MUAHAHAHA!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Jack Spicer fan club

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown. If I did, do you think Rai would have become evil! (I know he became good again but still…)

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"Hey losers." Jack Spicer said with a smirk on his face.

"Surrender the shen gong wu now, or suffer a most humiliating defeat!" Omi said, but then thought for a few seconds "What was the new shen gong wu again, Dojo?"

"I told you chasing Jack was a bad idea!" Dojo yelled, throwing his arms into the air "And I also told you there wasn't a new shen gong wu!"

"Then what is Jack doing here?" Kimiko asked with a confused look on her face.

"You know, that is a good question…" Jack rubbed his chin "Oh well. JACK-BOT, ATTACK!"

One tiny Jack-bot tried attacking Raimundo with a small laser that barely penetrated his robes.

"Ooh I'm so scared." Raimundo said sarcastically, then destroyed the tiny robot with a mere flick of his pinky "Not."

"How many times must I tell you," Wuya groaned "These robots are useless! I don't even know why we are here!"

"Hm…oh yeah!" A light bulb appeared over Jack's head "I got a call from the Jack Spicer, evil genius, fan club. They said they would meet me here."

"Why in tarnation would a low life like you have a fan club!" Clay was tired of not talking and decided to break his silence "That's more ridiculous than a rabbit wearin' my hat and a horse saddle."

"What is this 'fan club'?" Omi asked, totally clueless as usual "Is it a weapon club made out of the fans that women use?"

"No." Kimiko said "It's like a group of…"

"Supporters?" Raimundo suggested.

Kim nodded.

"Ah yes." Omi pointed to a group of girls that were running towards him at an alarming speed "Is that a so called 'fan club'?"

The Xaiolin warriors' eyes widened. About 30 girls, with red hair (like Jack Spicer's), weird marks under their eyes (Also like Jack Spicer's), and t-shirts that said 'Jack Spicer iz da' kewlest!' , suddenly ran over the poor warriors and dojo, causing them so not be able to move for 30seconds.

"It's Jack Spicer!" One of the girls from the fan club pointed at Jack, making the other girls squeal happily "He's so cute…" Little hearts appeared in the girls' eyes.

Dojo immediately turned into his 40 foot long self and the 4 warriors hopped on his back.

"We are innie!" Omi said as Dojo started flying away.

"Outtie." Raimundo said automatically.

"That too."

"That fan club was stranger than a buffalo at a dairy farm!" Clay looked back at the girls drooling over Jack "But I still don't understand why he has a fan club in the first place."

"Do we want to know?" Rai looked at everyone with his eye twitching.

"No." Kimiko pulled out her gamepal and began to play Goo Zombies 2.

"Do you ever stop playing that?" Rai cocked an eyebrow.

"Shut up, circus boy."

"Don't make me steal your diary."

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AN: So…there you have it. All of the chapters are going to be pointless and stupid.

Kim: Why did you make me be mean to Rai?

Me: Cause I can! And it brings in the plot for the next chapter!

Kim: He's gonna steal my dairy!

Me: Nod, nod

Kim: rips her dairy to shreds

Me: I made copies you know. I'm not stupid.

Kim: Why me!

Me: shrug

Kim:glare

Me: laughs nervously Flames allowed?

Kim: That's better.

Me: Um… coughevilcough BYE!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Kim's dairy

Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN! Do I need to tell you again?

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"LUNCH TIME!" Dojo yelled at the top of his lungs "GET OVER HERE BEFORE RAI AND CLAY EAT ALL THE FOOD!"

"HEY!" Rai and Clay yelled at the same time.

"Last one to the table is a rotten egg!" Kim began to run towards the table.

Since Omi took 45 seconds to react he was the last one at the table.

"No! I have become an egg that is rotted!" Omi cried in despair but then looked at the food on the table "I am most hungry."

Omi sat in his chair and began stuffing his face with…broccoli? Rai was eating all of the food on his plate as fast as he could.

"Took ya' long enough." Rai said through a mouthful of food "I would have expected Clay to loose, seeing his element is Earth."

"Raimundo…" Clay growled.

"Why are you eating so fast?" Kimiko sweatdropped "I know you like food, but jeez!"

"I…have something to do." Raimundo swallowed the last of his food and wiped his face with a napkin "Later."

"Raimundo is actin' like a dog that's been starved for a month." Clay felt stupid for saying this later-it wasn't exactly one of his best metaphors.

Rai tiptoed into Kimiko's 'room' (if that's what you want to call it) and started searching for her dairy and quickly found it under her pillow. Why hadn't he thought of this before? He tiptoed back into his own room and sat on the mat he used as a bed and opened the fuzzy purple diary. _Figures Kimi forgot to get a diary with a lock._ Rai thought to himself grinning. He began to read.

_**Dear Diary,**_

**_Today I arrived at this 'Xiaolin Temple' place. I don't really like it but its waaaaaaaaaaay better than home. But what I hate is that I am surrounded by guys! There's old Master Fung,…_**

_What happened to Master Fung anyway?_ Raimundo hadn't seen Master Fung or any of the elders for quite a while. _Oh yeah! That nytheprincess girl took over our lives and made it so he never existed ! Wait…am I supposed to know that? Ah well._ He continued to read.

…**_that weird monk Omi, the metaphor obsessed Clay, and the jerk, Raimundo._**

_Jerk! Kimi thinks I'm a jerk! I'm not a jerk! _ He reluctantly began to read again.

_**Hmph. Stupid Rai.**_

_**Sincerely,**_

_**Kimiko Toho **_

Rai quickly flipped through the rest of Kimiko's diary. _Jack Spicer is gross…Omi is weird…blah blah bl- WHAT THE! SHE THINKS I'M THE WORST GUY ON EARTH! _Feeling like an idiot, he ran back into Kimiko's room with the diary and stuffed it under her pillow. He ran into the hall and bumped right into Kimiko.

"Watch where you're going!" Luckily she was playing her gamepal and didn't notice that Raimundo had been in her room.

"Sorry." Rai muttered as he went into his room. He sat on his pillow "I am NOT doing that again."

"Doing what again?" Master Fung asked stepping into Raimundo's room.

"Well I- wait, WHAT IN THE NAME OF DASHI ARE YOU DOING HERE!"

"I have no idea." Master Fung started to fade "Good-bye."

Raimundo's jaw nearly dropped to the floor as Master Fung completely disappeared.

"What in the world was that about?"

"STOP YELLING RAI!" Kimiko, Omi, Clay, and Dojo yelled at the top of their lungs at the same time "SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO SLEEP!"

Raimundo looked at his digital clock. 11:00pm. Wait, 11:00pm! _We just had lunch! How fast does time move over here! Eh! Who cares._ He immediately grabbed his teddy bear, put his head on the pillow, and began to snore.

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AN: That chapter was a little creepy don't ya' think?

Rai: No DUH! I don't go snooping into people's diary you know.

Me: Right.

Rai: What was with the teddy bear thing?

Me: The episode when you were talking to Wuya, remember?

Rai: Oh yeah…but with the whole Kimiko's diary thing, that was freakin' OOC.

Me: Yeah, I mean, knowing her, in real life the diary would have said the exact opposite.

Rai: Huh!

Kimi: KILL THE AUTHORESS! tries to stab nytheprincess with the sword of the storm

Me: dodges BYE!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: CHEESE!

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown already! This is a _fan_fiction people!

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Clay sat looking nearly dead under a tree. He was bored out of his wits. Nothing to do…a smile spread across his face. He remembered that Omi had never seen-let alone eaten-cheese before. And if he was correct, people usually wanted a lot more cheese after having just a small portion. Grinning, Clay walked over to Omi.

"Hey there pardner'."

"Hello, Clay my good friend! How is your day?"

"It's a perfect day. Say Omi, how would you like to try some cheese?" Clay pulled some cheese of his pocket and handed it to Omi.

"What is this 'cheese'?" Omi examined the cheese carefully "Is it good to eat?"

"Sure is."

Omi took a small bite of the cheese and his eyes brightened. He started taking very large bites of the cheese.

"Um…Omi shouldn't you slow it down a little?"

Omi hissed at Clay and finished the last of the cheese.

"I want more cheese!"

"I don't have anymore!"

Kimiko and Raimundo walked over and saw the scene that Omi was making.

"Whoa. What's going on?" Raimundo didn't know if he should laugh or start holding Omi down.

"CHEESE!"

"Clay…did you give Omi cheese?" Kimiko asked.

"I was bored!" Clay protested.

Kimiko and Raimundo both sighed and began dragging Omi over to a tree while Clay followed. When they got to the tree, Kim and Rai repeatedly hit Omi's head against the tree. Clay's eye's widened.

"Don't (bang) worry (bang) Clay (bang). Omi's (bang) head (bang) will (bang) survive (bang)." Rai finally put Omi down on the ground.

"You okay?" Kimiko asked sweetly.

"I think so…" Omi said rubbing his head "But I have a headache that is most painful."

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AN: That was short, simple, and just plain stupid. For some reason I can't imagine Clay saying the word "cheese". I think in this episode that Clay was really OOC (out of character). It doesn't seem like something Clay would do. Seems more like Rai. Wait…if I think Clay was OOC why am I putting this on Well I _might _have done that if I was super ultra bored.

Me: Whatever. What is it with me and making character OOC?

Clay:shrugs

Me: You're not helping.

Clay: I know.

Me: eye twitch Then why do you bother wasting your breath?

Clay: 'Cause.

Me: 'Cause why?

Clay: 'Cause you're as dull as a sack of hammers.

Me: AM NOT!

Clay: ARE TO!

Me: BYE!

Clay: ARE- oh uh…bye…


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Lot's of chatspeak

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown. But I want to.

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"Hi Rai!" Kimiko said to Rai in a squeaky sort of voice "How r u?"

"I am 1337."

"No ur not! I am the only people's who is 1337!"

"R not!"

"R 2!"

"R not!"

"D 2!"

"Huh?"

"Ya no, R2D2?"

"Oooo i c."

"The closed captioning is most confusing." Omi was reading the closed captioning at the bottom of the TV screen he was in "I can not understand it."

"Pardner', I just as confused as you are." Clay scratched his head "Maybe those two spent too much time on the internet?"

"Possibly."

"Wheeeeee! Chickens r flying into spaces!" Kimiko burst out with an insane look on her face.

"No. Chickens r not flying R2D2 is." Raimundo threw a box into the air that said R2D2 on it "C!"

Clay and Omi slapped their palms against their foreheads.

"SHUT IT ALREADY!" Clay and Omi yelled at the top of their lungs.

Raimundo opened his mouth to talk, but nothing came out. Kimiko was also attempting to talk and was failing miserably.

"The power of the off switch!" Omi grinned as he pointed to the on/off switches on Rai and Kim that had been switched to the off position.

"Well I'll be a two headed Texas rattler…" Clay's eye twitched "How did those get there?"

"I do not think I want to know."

"Good point."

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AN: Um…(twitch) I don't know what I was thinking when I typed this.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Two more character's of insane properties

Disclaimer: Idon'townXioalinShowdownokaysogetoutofmyfaceandleavemealone.

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"Darn fan-fic." Dojo mumbled "I'm only in the darned thing 2 times… oh wait… no 3….but still…"

Not paying attention to where he was walking er…slithering, Dojo's face slammed in a sign.

"Ow!" Dojo rubbed his nose "Who put this thing here?"

**_Poke this sign, and a new character will appear. _**Dojo read. Hm…a new character eh? What harm could it do? He poked the sign with his finger and a small orange fox appeared in front of him.

"Hi!" The small fox excitedly "I'm Gills, who are you?"

"Erm…" Dojo blinked "I'm Dojo, but er…why is your name 'Gills'?"

"Cause I can do this!" The fox hopped into a small puddle and immediately turned into a fish.

"Oh…"

"But I can turn into other animals too." Gills crossed his eyes and then became a hippopotamus.

"Okay…" Dojo looked back at the sign and it had changed. Now it said: **_Poke the sign again, and someone else will appear._** Dojo poked the sign again and there was a bright flash.

"What am I doing here?" A girl with short brown hair and bright blue eyes said "I'm not supposed to be in my fic!"

"YOU'RE NYTHEPRINCESS!" Dojo exclaimed in surprise while Gills did the Hokey Pokey and turned into Homer Simpson "WE'RE BEING CONTROLLED BY A LITTLE KID!"

"I'm _not _little." Nytheprincess said as Gills did the moonwalk and turned back into a fox "Are you the one who poked the sign?"

"Um, you're the AUTHOR, so shouldn't you already know that?"

"Well did you?"

"Yeah."

"Hm… I still don't know why I made that fox-thing…"

"Can I kill it?"

"No."

"Why!"

"I want it to annoy the heck out of Jack."

"Oh. I see."

"Hello losers." Jack Spicer flew down in his heli-pack but then looked around "Where are the Xiaolin losers?"

"Alaska." Dojo said "They're taking a vacation. But where's Wuya?"

"I think she like dissolved or something." Jack said glancing at Gills with a confused look "There are foxes in China?"

"It's not a fox." Nytheprincess picked up Gills "He's a shape-shifter."

"Yeah right." Jack rolled his eyes, but then Gills stuck out his tongue and turned into a cat "HOLY MOLY!"

"Told ya'." Ny (AN: I'm just going to put Ny instead of Nytheprincess) grinned.

"Who are you anyway? Jack asked Ny.

"I'm Nytheprincess, author of this random fan-fic." Ny said in a buisnessy sort of voice "But please call me Ny."

"Wait…you're an author?"

Ny nodded.

"So you have author powers?" Jack's voice was getting squeaky.

Ny nodded again.

"Um… I GOTTA GO!" Jack flew away as fast as he could on his heli-pack.

"Scaredy cat!" Ny laughed.

"You got that right!" Dojo high-fived Ny, causing her to drop Gills "Oops."

Gills did the moonwalk again and turned back into a fox.

"Let's go to the temple." Dojo slithered to the temple while Ny and Gills followed.

"Hey Dojo!" Kimiko and the boys walked towards Dojo "We're back from Alaska!"

To be continued…

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AN: I just wanted Dojo to have the spotlight for a little bit.

Dojo: Yay! Someone actually cares about me!

Me: Not really…but I like than Omi, I'll give you that.

Dojo: Well it's a start I guess. But what was with that fox thing?

Me: How many animals do you know that can do the moonwalk?

Dojo: I see.

Me: No you don't.

Dojo: What!

Me: BYE! (starts running for dear life)

Dojo: GET BACK HERE! (starts chasing Ny)


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Don't mess with the author

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown, but I do own Gills the fox/ shape-shifter.

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Omi finally noticed Ny and Gills "Who are you two?"

"I'm Ny, the author," Ny pointed at herself "And this is my pet shape-shifter, Gills." She pointed at Gills.

"Shape-shifter!" Clay laughed "That's more unbelievable than cows flyin' around."

"Whatever." Ny crossed her arms "Gills, turn into an elephant."

"Okey-dokey." Gills bit his foot and immediately turned into an elephant "Ooh! I'm tall now! YAY!"

"Okay…" Rai rolled his eyes "But you'd think the _author_ would be a little more impressive."

Ny's eyes flashed. "You are SO gonna regret saying that." Balls of white energy suddenly appeared in her hands and she launched them at Raimundo and he went flying.

"AAAAAHHH!" Rai landed on the temple roof "Hey get me down from here!"

Gills did the moonwalk to turn himself back into a fox and said "Just a word of advice, don't mess with the author."

"I don't think I will." Kimiko glanced at Rai "Shouldn't we get him down?"

"Yes, get me down so I can kick her butt!"

Ny sighed. "Fine. Get him down Gills."

"Alrighty." Gills bit his tail and turned into a large bird. He flew up to the temple roof, grabbed Rai in is beak and brought him down to the ground.

"Wait…" Clay thought for a moment "Couldn't you have just used yer' wind powers to get down?"

"Yeah," Rai smirked "But I wanted to see if you guys would actually realize that _before _you got me down."

Everyone sweatdropped while Gills did the moonwalk and turned back into a fox.

"Hm… what should I do in this situation…" Gills said thoughtfully "Ooh! I know!" Gills bit Rai's hand.

"GETITOFGETITOFFGETITOFF!" Rai tried to shake off Gills but it was no use "I'M GONNA GET RAIBIES!"

"Rabies , Raimundo?" Omi laughed "That is most stupid."

"Omi's got a point Rai." Kimiko was trying her hardest not to laugh "I mean, come on, rabies?" Kimiko gave in and finally burst out laughing.

"Besides," Ny grinned "He's already got his shots anyway!"

"I DON'T CARE!" Rai's arm was becoming a blur "GET. IT. OFF!"

"For a start," Clay looked really annoyed "Stop wavin' yer' arm around like a maniac."

"Don't worry. I'll get it off." Ny snapped her fingers and Gills let go of Rai "I've had my fun."

"Ya' think!" Rai snapped.

"Well actually…" Ny grinned "The fun has only begun."

"HELP US!" The 4 warriors yelled at the same time.

"AND LET ME TALK!" Dojo suddenly yelled "I HAVEN'T TALKED FOR THE WHOLE DARNED CHAPTER!" (AN: oops)

"Sorry bout' that." Ny sweatdropped.

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AN: Sorry about Dojo not talking for the whole chapter. I actually forgot he was there! Thanks for the reviews everyone! Especially Kosmic! Thank you for reviewing every chapter, Kosmic! And the hug! And for teaching me how you can learn from randomness! And also, I'm going to be on vacation in California for 2 weeks, but I'll work on some chapters while I'm there! BYE!


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Script format!

Disclaimer: I do not own Xiaolin Showdown. I do not own The Sims 2. I do own Gills the shape shifter. Do not steal him.

AN: I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

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Ny: Uh oh.

Rai: What?

Ny: Some evil force is making it so this chapter has to be in script format!

Omi: xx

Ny: The same evil force has also killed Omi.

Master Fung: NOOOOO NOT OMI!

Ny: Quiet old man. You're _supposed_ to be in my Sims 2 game, remember?

Master Fung: Gets sucked into a vortex AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

Kimiko:_ So that's what happened to Master Fung. Wait…why am I speaking in italics!_

Rai: Let me guess, evil forces?

Ny: nods

Clay: in robotic voice This is ridiculous.

Dojo: La la la la la. I like chickens! La la la la la. I like chickens!

Gills: How cwome nothtin' is hwappening to Ny and Rai? (AN: Babyish voice! Yay! .)

Ny: Cause Rai got attacked last chapter, and I'm the author, so I am IMMUNE!

Jack: **_Look at me! I'm speaking in italics, bold, AND, underlining!_**

Wuya: Red is a purty color. And so is blue and green and brown…

Ny: sweatdrop Okay…

Rai: Ny rhymes with Rai! YAY!

Ny: stares

Rai: Just kidding.

Ny: You'd better be.

Katnappe!?sdrawkcab gnikaeps I ma yhW !HGA (AN: Read it backwards)

Rai: Huh?

Ny: The evil force will be gone by the next chapter.

Rai: That's good.

Ny: And in the next chapter, we shall start a journey.

Rai: Really?

Ny: Depends.

Rai: Oh.

Ny: But if we do… Jack, Wuya, and Katnappe can't come!

Jack: **_Why!_**

Ny: Because you are all really, really, really, really, 1 hour later really annoying!

Katnappe!?GNIYONNA EM GNILLAC UOY ERA YHW !gniyonna ton m'I

Wuya: That's okay…maroon is a prettyishaful (AN: A word my friends and I made up) color…

Kimiko:_ END THIS CHAPTER ALREADY!_

Ny: Okay, okay, jeez…

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AN: Wow my vacation was hectic! I had to wear my hair in pigtail everyday! Too bad I didn't get a tan…I really need one. I look like a China doll! All I got was sun burnt! I got one sunburn on each shoulder and one on my arm, which looks like the side view of a slipper.

I got to go to Disney land (twice), California Adventure, Sea World, and San Diego Zoo! After the first week, we went to San Jose, but then I got sick. I think I caught stomach flu. So I spent the last 3 days of my vacation hanging out with a 13 year old girl. I got to watch Spaceballs! Funny…. Anyway now you know why I only have 3 chapters to give you, but they're good I assure you! But now that the story seems to have a plot maybe I should change the title….BYE!


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: The Journey Begins…sort of.

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown or Gamecube or Barbie. (You thought I was going to come up with a funny disclaimer, didn't you? Well TOO BAD. This one is serious! Wait…am I putting this in the disclaimer section! slow motion NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!)

Notice: If you are insulted by gay jokes, please don't flame me unless you are really, really mad and you never want me to crack a gay joke again.

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"WAKE UP!" Gills shouted at the top of his lungs "WE MUST START OUR JOURNEY TO GAMECUBELAND!"

"Eh? Wha?" Kimiko yawned while rubbing her eyes "Gamecubeland…?"

"It's not really a journey." Ny somehow had been awake all night and was holding a video camera "We have to make a movie so we can enter the contest to win the 7 tickets to Gamecubeland."

"Okay." Raimundo sat up and crossed his arms "But why can't you just conjure up the tickets with your author powers?"

"One, I don't feel like it," Ny rolled her eyes "And two, it fills up another chapter, doesn't it?"

"But," Clay looked around frantically "I have stage fright!"

"Not in my world!"

"Oh, okay. No more stage fright."

"Now how is THAT supposed to work!" Dojo eyes widened.

"Author magic."

"Hmph." Dojo looked extremely annoyed "Why can't I have powers?"

"You'd kill us all!" Raimundo joked, making everyone but Dojo laugh "Wait…is Omi still dead?" Rai glanced at Omi who looked as though he was still asleep.

"I'll do the dead test!" Kimiko took a stick out of her tunic and began to poke Omi with it "Maybe harder…" She started jabbing Omi in the head with her stick as hard as she could.

"OKAY, OKAY!" Ny grabbed Kimiko's arm to keep her from poking Omi with the stick again "WE GET IT ALREADY! HE'S DEAD!"

"I thought you said that the evil forces would be gone." Rai looked confused.

"Well apparently," Ny was still holding onto Kimiko, who was struggling to poke Omi "They stayed with Omi."

"Can't you sent them away with yer' powers?" Clay asked.

"No." Ny punched Kimiko in the head, knocking her out "We have to go to Gamecubeland and get the golden Gamecube of power. It can bring a person back to life, but after it does…"

"What?" Rai looked like a five-year-old that desperately wanted to know what he was getting for Christmas "Tell me! TELL ME!"

"Gills will turn purple."

"WHAT!" Rai, Clay, and Dojo yelled at the same time.

"But then he'll look…" Dojo drifted off still looking shocked.

"Like a girl." Ny finished for him "Yeah…"

"I _can_ change my gender you know." Gills looked insulted.

"DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW!" Clay and Rai shouted at the same time.

"Let's start making the movie before we kill ourselves." Paper suddenly appeared in Ny's hands and she began to pass them out to everyone "These are your scripts, memorize them by tomorrow."

Kimiko woke up and grabbed a script "All of this," She held up the script "In one night!"

"Yup. Now start memorizing."

"But…" Clay protested.

"MEMORIZE!"

Everyone scurried off to start memorizing.

-The next morning-

"That was horrible!" Ny had just used up the last bit of film and everyone had done a bad job with their lines "What were you all doing last night!"

"Er, memorizing?" Raimundo tried.

"Right." A wide-screen TV popped up in front of Ny "We'll see about that. Let's look at what you were doing first, Rai."

The TV screen merely showed Rai's empty room.

"Okay then…Kimiko."

The TV showed Kim and Rai playing house with Barbie dolls.

"That there," Clay pointed at the screen "Just ain't right."

"Okay." Ny's eye twitched "Clay's turn."

Clay danced around on the screen, practicing ballet moves.

"You do ballet!" Kimiko's jaw dropped "But that's-that's…"

"Don't say it. I think we already know." Ny looked somewhere in between having the worst day of her life and laughing her head off "Dojo's turn."

The TV screen showed Dojo going over to the fridge and stuffing his face with stale cake and pies.

"What?" Dojo said while everyone stared at him "I was hungry."

Suddenly the TV screen flashed and showed Gills humming idiotically to himself.

"What the..?" A question mark appeared over Ny's head.

Gills grabbed the video out of the camera.

"Give that back!" Ny grabbed at the video tape but Gills pulled it away.

"Because you have embarrassed us all, I'm sending this in." Gills had a smug look on his face.

"Oh fine."

Gills threw the video tape over the temple wall.

"That's how you send it in!" Rai gaped.

Gills nodded and put his paw on his head, turning himself into a duck.

"I wanna be a duck now!" Gills quacked.

"FINE." Everyone but Gills said at the same time.

"Be a purple duck if that's what you really want." Dojo stated.

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AN: Oy, that was weird. No offense to any gays out there if you were insulted by Kimiko's comment. I mean I'm straight, but I have nothing against those whose interests in people are different than mine.

Clay: So Kim was callin' me gay back there?

Me: Sort of…but you aren't gay, are you?

Clay: Well it depends on how you look at it…

Me: I'll assume that means that you're straight in my world.

Clay: Yeah, pretty much.

Gills: I wanna turn purple! NOW!

Me: We have to get the golden Gamecube-

Gills: NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOW!

Me: That's not till the next chapter, and only if we win the contest!

Gills: But-

Me: BYE!


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Loosing control , raising the dead, and turning purple! Oy…

Disclaimer: That's it! I'm sick of reading the disclaimer! Omi! You read it!

Omi: Ny does not own Xiaolin Showdown or the Gamecube gaming system. Wait, how can I be reading the disclaimer if I am deceased!

Me: This isn't part of the story!

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Ny held three envelopes that had shown up in the mailbox that day and opened the first one with suspense rising in her body "Bills! I think its Clay's turn to pay…" She threw the bills on the ground and opened the second envelope "Hm, blackmail. Someone is threatening to steal Gills and put him in their story. Well I got a message for you, buster." Ny glared at the camera "If anyone, I mean _anyone_, steals Gills, they will get a million flames from me. And probably some of my viewers too, since this story_ is_ getting a little popular." She ripped the letter to shreds and tore open the last envelope "Blah, blah, blah, we are happy to bl- OH MY GOD!" Ny fell onto the bills that she had thrown on the ground earlier and fainted.

"Come _on, _Ny. Wake up!" Ny could barely hear Dojo.

"Should we do CPR?" Figures Raimundo would say that.

"No you idiot! That's for when someone drowns! She only fainted from shock." Kimiko. Ny could hear better now.

"It ain't no wonder why she was shocked. Our video ACTUALLY won the bloody contest." Since when does Clay say 'bloody'?

"HOW IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MAKE SENSE!" Dojo, Rai, and Kimiko all yelled, unfortunately at the same time Ny's hearing fully recovered, causing her to jump up and yelp in pain.

"Ow!" Ny rubbed her ears.

"Sorry." Kimiko said embarrassed.

"Anyway," Clay with a hint of a British accent in his voice "The only reason we won the bloody contest was because the tickets to Gamecubeland cost 4 bloody dollars so there was only one other bloody entry. Obviously it was more bloody stupid than ours because it was of a little bloody bunny dancing around with a bloody cupcake on its bloody head to some God forsaken bloody techno music."

"Stop saying bloody already!" Raimundo looked as annoyed as anyone can get "And what's with the accent!"

"Did you do that?" Dojo asked Ny.

"No." Ny paused "But that means…"

"Means what?" Kimiko sounded a little worried.

"I've lost control of Clay." Ny had a blank expression on her face "Someone else is controlling him now, and soon they might control the whole fanfic."

"You've lost bloody control of me?" Clay looked excited "I'm bloody free!" He looked at the puzzled expressions from everyone "I was just bloody joking."

DUN DUN DUN! (AN: It's kinda like that sound that goes off in the cartoons when something really bad happens)

"What was that?" Rai looked around.

"GET AWAY FROM THE SOUND AFFECTS MACHINE GILLS!" Ny yelled a little louder than she originally intended.

"Sorry ma'm." Gills pulled himself away from the sound affects machine.

"I guess we can worry about my loosing control of the fanfiction next chapter!" Ny looked extremely perky "We have to bring Omi back to life anyway!"

"What is it with you and chapters?" Kimiko said with her eyebrow twitching.

"My life revolves around chapters! If there weren't chapters, we'd be DOOMED." Ny had a horrified look on her face.

"Nut job." Dojo mumbled

"I HEARD THAT!"

"Shouldn't we be going to Gamecubeland?" Rai waved around the tickets he was holding in his hand.

"Yup." Ny picked up Omi's dead body and in a white flash they were all in Gamecubeland.

"Oh bloody god." Clay looked around "Bloody white flashes, bloody Gamecube rides, bloody Gamecube food. Let's bloody do this as bloody quick as bloody possible."

"Quack! Quack!"

"Just because you're a duck Gills, doesn't mean you have to quack all the time!" Kimiko scoffed.

"QUACK!" Gills pointed his wing at a Gamecube, and it was gold!

"It's the golden Gamecube!" Ny said excitedly.

"Yeah we kinda' figured that out seeing it's gold and all." Dojo rolled his eyes.

"Your sarcasm is killing me Dojo." Ny went over to the Golden Gamecube and put Omi's body down next to it "By the powers vested in me-"

"Just one question." Rai interrupted.

"WHAT NOW!"

"Is the Golden Gamecube a Shen-Gong-Wu?

"No. Now let me bring the goody two-shoes back to life!" A vein popped on her forehead "By the powers vested in me, bring back my least favorite Xiaolin Warrior back from the dead!"

Omi woke up as if he had been sleeping and looked at Gills.

"Why is Gills purple?" He asked.

A now purple Gills was running around in circles around the group quacking hysterically.

"What do we bloody do with the bloody Golden Gamecube." Clay grabbed Golden Gamecube.

"Chuck it at him." Ny pointed at a random person passing by.

"Okay." Clay chucked it at the person and the Golden Gamecube ended up flattening the person "Who did I just kill?"

"Congratulations, Clay." Ny grinned "You just killed Michael Jackson."

----------------------

AN: Lol. I don't own Michael Jackson either, just so you know.

Wuya: Where am I? What am I doing in this room with this pathetic contraption!

Ny: This is my Author's Note. THAT is a camera.

Wuya: Grr. I hate it here! Where is Jack?

Ny: That looser? Killed him. (lol not really, but Wuya doesn't know that)

Wuya: NO! Now I shall never rule the world!

Ny: Neither will I. Get over it already. No one's going to rule the world.

Wuya: What! I that I ever believed in, it's GONE! starts sobbing

Ny: Ghost hag sobbing? This is new.

Wuya: NO ONE LOVES ME!

Ny: Well duh.

Wuya: Withers into dust

Ny: Now that's just a little TOO weird. BYE!


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Ny has a temper and isn't afraid to use it.

Disclaimer: Since I haven't put Chase Young in this fanfic and probably never will…you take it Chase!

Chase: Ny does not own Xiaolin Showdown and never will. Not even in her dreams. Not even in heaven. Not even-

Ny: I GET IT!

---------------------

At the Xiaolin Temple it had been a week after bringing Omi back to life and all was well at the Temple, bills had been paid, people (and animals) had been fed, yes everything was as good as possible…or so it seemed…

"SOMEONE STOLE MY UNDERWEAR!"

Well it was normal, or at least as normal as things got at the Xiaolin Temple.

"No one stole it Kimi… Ny is washing it." (AN: Rai can call Kimiko 'Kimi' right?)

Ny had taken to washing anything that was slightly dirty (by hand) to distract herself from thinking about loosing control of the fanfiction. The Temple had never been cleaner, which was pretty amazing, considering that she was the only one cleaning it, and that she was usu-ally a complete slob.

"Does anyone know where the bleach is?"

The person who was controlling Clay was closer than Ny knew. He was actually watching her this very moment-

"So are you saying she has a stalker?"

Wha- Dojo! You're not supposed to be able to hear me!

"Oh. Sorry."

As I was saying…He was glancing at her through a crack in the fence behind Ny, his body hidden in the shrubs, clearly he was deciding what to do next…his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Yes! A fresh idea popped into his mind. Now to put it into action…

"AHHH!"

The predator head butted into the fence, which made a huge hole in the fence big enough for him to climb through and so that's was he did…

"What in the _world_ do you think you're doing!"

Ny put her hands on her hips in a sort of motherly way. She was wearing jeans and a grey t-shirt and was sporting a red cap to keep her hair from getting in her face. Ny's hands were wet and covered with enough soap to clean the whole wall of China.

"Uh, breaking in?"

The predator was a blond male of about 15. He was wearing baggy black pants, a black shirt with a skull on it (the sleeves had been rip-ped off) and a spiky collar on his neck. He had the whole punk look about him.

"Are you done yet?"

Yes I am Ny. That is all the description we need.

"Care to explain why you're here, _sir_?"

Ny strained the last word to annoy him, a smirk folding across her face.

"My name is Chris, I'm here to take over your fanfiction."

The smirk from Ny's face immediately faded and was replaced by a look of sheer terror.

"_You _took over Clay?"

"Yes. And now for all of it…"

"But why _mine_? You could have tried someone else! I mean there are lots of other fanfictions that are better than mine! Like one from Kosmic –he has a lot- or the one SweetGlade made? Their fanfics are way better than mine!"

"Yes but…I wanted a fanfic that stood out. Yours is one of a kind in the Xiaolin Showdown region. You manage to have humorous situa-tions while being able to make the fanfiction have almost nothing to do with Xiaolin Showdown."

Suddenly Ny felt so angry she was going to burst. This stupid teen wanted her fanfiction for _attention_! He was _never _going to get the fanfic if _she _had anything to say about it.

"You…you want it for attention…?"

"You could say that, yes."

That had done it. Ny's normally calm, sea colored eyes became a fierce glowing red. Kimiko wasn't the only one with fire powers…

"FIRE!"

Ny held both her hands out in front of her facing her palms at Chris. Fireballs shot out of her palms and flew toward him but he placed a shield of water and they bounced off of it.

"You're not the only one that has Author powers."

"But I control more than you when you're on my turf.

Ny's eye's changed to yellow and she shot lightning bolts everywhere but Chris put a rubber bubble around himself. Ny's temper sudd-enly lost control and her eye's turned forest green. She waved her hands around and then Chris' rubber bubble burst and vines wrapped around him.

"Now STAY THERE."

"Fine. But you'll pay for this."

"Whatever."

Ny walked away (her eyes had turned back to their original color by now) and literally dragged everyone over to Chris. Well, almost every-one.

"Where are Kimiko and Rai?"

Ny looked around at Omi, Clay, Dojo, and Gills.

"Think about it." Dojo said simply.

"Oh." Ny said quickly then pointed at Chris "So what do we do with this criminal over here?"

Everyone shrugged.

"Fine. Reviewers out there! Review this fanfic and give me your ideas! The best one will be put into the next Chapter, and you will get credit! And if no one gives me any ideas or I only get 1 idea…no more chapters!"

DUN DUN DUN!

----------------------

AN: I decided to do a different style of writing for one chapter. I'll go back to the old style next chapter (if there is one). And by the way, by 'ideas' I don't mean some crud from off the top of your head. I mean something well thought out! I'm TRYING to include you guys!


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Commercials and Infomercials

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown.

AN: Okay, okay. I know I said there wouldn't be another chapter until I got a few more ideas from my viewers. But I'm SO freakin' bored, so I'll just give you a few commercials and infomercials for your mild entertainment. And all in script format!

-----------------

Infomercial #1: Why I just don't do some things here

Ny: Okay, now some of you people out there might be wondering why I don't do a few certain things. Well for one thing, there are usually consequences if I do those things. Like poking Omi's head for example. pokes Omi's head

Omi: head begins to inflate Um, Ny? I am beginning to think that this was not a very good idea. begins to float out of open window

Ny: Good thing it was a clone.

Kimiko: That wasn't a clone! That was the real Omi!

Ny: WHAT! RAI! GET HIM DOWN!

Rai: Okey doeky artichoeky! (AN: Is that how you spell it?) uses wind powers to fly up, grabs Omi and ties him to a pole

Ny: sighs This is why we don't poke Omi's head. Now I also don't remove the little medallion that Raimundo wears, let's see why. takes off Raimundo's medallion with the little swirl on it

Rai: turns into a mouse Put that back on!

Ny: Well I would but-

Rai: But what?

Ny: We need to move on to a commercial break.

Commercial #1: Buy a murderer

Dojo: Sick of your mom, mortal enemy, or annoying roommate?

Jack: watching TV Oh yeah!

Dojo: Then you need to buy a murderer! Only 900,000,000 dollars!

Jack: Well I might have to hack a few accounts, but okay.

Dojo: Note: By accord of law; evil geniuses trying to take over the world with an evil ghost by their side cannot buy a murderer.

Jack: Noooooooooooooooo!

Infomercial #2: What happened to Master Fung and The Elder Monks?

Ny: Alright, this infomercial is about what happened to Master Fung and The Elder Monks.

Kimiko: Can you turn Wai-Wai and Omi back to normal first?

Ny: Wai-Wai?

Kimiko: Er- I mean Rai?

Ny: I don't wanna know. snaps fingers and Rai and Omi return back to normal Now as I was saying…as you know Master Fung got sucked into my Sims 2 game. The same thing happened to the elder monks. I basically left free will on and went to bed. When I woke up, everyone except for Master Fung had died of old age! And Master Fung looked as though he was about to die any time soon.

Rai: So, you sent Master Fung and The Elders into your video and sent them to a natural/unnatural death?

Ny: Yeah. And it looked as though Master Fung had made-out with all of the elders…

Everyone else: EW!

-----------------

AN: Okay… bye?


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: What we're gonna do to Chris

Disclaimer: I. Don't. Own. Xiaolin. Showdown. OKAY!

------------------

"Alright. I have decided." Ny said firmly "I'm going to take 2 of animegirl's ideas, so we shall one: poke Chris with a stick and two: annoy him with Jack Spicer's evil laugh!" (AN: Come on! This is supposed to be pointless and random. What did you expect?)

"What!" Chris struggled to untangle himself from the vines "No! Please! Not Jack Spicer's evil laugh!"

"You bloody deserve it you bloody freak!" Clay glared at Chris "Especially since you bloody gave me this bloody accent."

"About that…" Ny punched Clay in the back of the head and he fell to the ground.

"Why did you do that?" Omi asked.

"It'll get rid of the accent." Ny said.

"She's right you know." Chris said.

"Of course I'm right!" Said Ny angrily "Since when have I been wrong?"

"Well there was that one time…" Began Gills.

"How was I supposed to know that it was a gardenia!" Asked Ny frantically "Huh? HUH!"

"I see your point…"

Suddenly a silver dragon flew down in front of Dojo.

"Who's she?" Dojo drooled with little stars in his eyes.

"Her name is Nakarito (AN: I just made it up)," Ny said "She was a gift from Kosmic."

"Can she talk?"

"Not yet."

"When can we start the torturing?" Slurred Clay in his old Southern accent "Hey! My old accent is back!"

"Once Kimiko and Rai stop making out." Ny rolled her eyes "I need Kimiko to be the one to poke Chris with the stick, since that seems to be her specialty."

"Okay," Said Rai, waking out of some bushes with Kim "We're done now."

"What the freak!" Ny looked flabbergasted "I was _kidding_!"

Kim shrugged and picked up a stick off of the ground. She headed towards Chris to start poking him, but Ny stopped her.

"Wait. Let's make it as horrible as possible…" Ny took the stick from Kimiko and stuck it into a pencil sharpener that had magically appeared out of nowhere. After a couple of minutes, she pulled out the stick- which was now extremely sharp- and handed it to Kimiko.

Kimiko grinned evilly and went over to Chris.

"There has to be a law against this…" Chris mumbled.

"Not in Ny's world!" Kimiko laughed and began rapidly poking Chris in the head with the sharpened stick.

"Owowowowowowowowwowowowowowow!"

Kimiko continued poking Chris until he started bleeding –or more like Ny knocked her out to make her stop-.

"Alright, that's enough…" Ny groaned (AN: The poking had gone on for an hour) "Now for Jack's evil laugh." Ny took out a tape recorder labeled "Jack's evil laugh".

"Where'd you get that?" Raimundo asked.

"Nabbed it off of one of the Jack Spicer fans from the first chapter." Ny said, waving her hand around, causing earmuffs to appear on everyone's head –except for Chris' of course- "We're gonna need these."

"What?" Dojo said loudly.

"I SAID, WE'RE GONNA NEED THESE!"

"Oh." Dojo replied.

Ny pushed the play button on the tape record and Jack's annoying laugh started playing. Even if you were there and you didn't have earmuffs, you probably wouldn't be able to hear it, because Chris was shouting things like; "No! NO! NOOOO!" and "I want my teddy!"

at the top of his lungs. After about 3 hours Ny pushed the stop button on the tape recorder because a: She didn't want to stand around all day and b: She was beginning to be able to hear Chris' agonizing yells through the earmuffs.

"Finally, Jack's annoying sounds of glee are over!" Omi said while removing his earmuffs.

"So," Ny glared at Chris "Have you learned you lesson?"

"Yes." Chris said sadly "Can I go now?"

"Nope!' Ny grinned "I think I'll just leave you here. Come on guys."

Everyone turned around and walked towards the temple –Rai was dragging Kimiko's still unconscious body-.

"I can get out you kn-"

"No you can't." Said Gills suddenly "Those vines suck your powers into the ground and when powers are in the ground they make the tree grow peanut flavored cotton candy."

Everyone walked out of sight and left Chris tangled in the power absorbing vines.

"Hey! You can't leave me here!" He shouted after them "My head is still bleeding! What will I eat! HEY! GET BACK HERE YOU COWARDS! YOU'RE JUST AFRAID TO FIGHT ME!"

------------------

AN: Poor Chris. He'll probably live there forever since you don't have to eat in a fanfiction.

Chris: You're so cruel!

Ny: You're the one who tried to take over my fanfic!

Chris:...

Ny: Bye everyone…

Chris: Why do you say bye if they don't say bye back?

Ny: IT'S TRADITION! DON'T MESS IT UP!


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Meeting in the mind

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown, but I do own…CHEESE!

----------------------

Ny sat at a conference table that was surrounded by a thick black mist. In front of her were Omi, Rai, Kimiko, Clay, Gills, Dojo, Wuya, Jack, Chase Young, and Chris.

"How did you get us here?" Kimiko asked after a long silence.

"Magic pen from Kreepi Spicer." Ny twirled the pen in her fingers.

"It isn't a question of _how _we got here," Chase folded his hands on the table "But more of a question of _why_."

"I have brought you all here today…to chat."

"CHAT!" Everyone yelled at the same time.

"Yes. We have never had a proper conversation- oh wait," Ny snapped her fingers and a bolt of lightning shot from above Chris, it hit him and he disappeared into thin air "I will never have a proper conversation with HIM."

"Then what am _I_ doing here?" Chase Young stared at Ny coldly.

"Wuya gave me 50 bucks."

"Anyway," Raimundo "Since this is the 13th chapter, something is bound to go wrong, right?"

"Possibly." Said Omi "Since 13 is considered a most unlucky number."

"Ugh. Whatever." Ny said with a look of distaste on her face.

"Where's the bathroom?" Jack said suddenly.

"We're in my mind, you dumbnut!" Ny threw her arms into the air "There is no bathroom!"

"I told you to go before you came you imbecile!" Wuya screamed.

"Anyway, back in the black mist…" Raimundo rolled his eyes.

"What in tarnation do ya' want to talk about!" Clay gritted his teeth.

"How I should improve the fiction?" Ny asked.

"Well first it needs more…Jack Spicer." Jack said his name dramatically "And more bathroom breaks too."

"Dude, it took me MONTHS to post this." Ny said in a VERY frustrated voice "Don't you think you could have gone in that time?"

"But I need-" Jack began.

"Okay, THAT'S IT!" Ny slammed her hands onto the table and stood up "Everyone, GET JACK SPICER!"

"Amen to that, sister!" Dojo said in a preachy voice.

Everyone cocked an eyebrow at Dojo.

"What?"

Ny shrugged and signaled for everyone to attack Jack. They all lunged in and-

"AHHH!" Jack screamed as he jolted up from his bed "Oh, just a dream."

"No it wasn't." Said many evil voices at once, there were red eyes glowing all around him…

"AH!" Jack's scream was unusually high pitched (AN: Even for him) as he jolted up from his bed again.

"Hello, Jack." Wuya was at the foot of his bed, in her human form.

"AHHH!" Jack jolted up form his bed AGAIN, to find that he was in a double bed, with Katnappe sleeping right next to him "What the-?"

Katnappe opened her eyes softly.

"Hi, sweetie." Katnappe purred.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Think we should take him out of the torture chamber now?" Gills asked Ny.

"Nah."

----------------------

AN: Sorry it took so long to post! My mom took away my laptop for a month because she thought I was using it too much, then I got stuck on a super major writers block! Plus I started school so I can only type on the weekends . Thankfully I have the next chapter planned out, so you'll be seeing that soon! By the way, I will be continuing my other fic, but it may take weeks to get it up. Bye!


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: More Random Script formattedness

AN: Do I have to say it?

Everyone: YES!

Ny: Fine. I don't own Xiaolin Showdown and-

Rai: You never will?

Ny: That's it! (tackles Rai and begins to punch him repeatedly)

---------------------

Ny: Oh great. GILLS!

Gills: (appears out of thin air) Yes?

Ny: AH! Oh uh…did you start a new chapter -in script format- _without_ my permission!

Gills: No…

Ny: Then what are you doing here!

Gills: Fine. I did. HAPPY!

Ny: …

Gills: I said-

Omi, Clay, Rai, Kimiko, and Dojo: (Appears out of thin air)

Ny and Gills: AH!

Rai: I heard that another chapter has started. What do you want us to do?

Gills: (sarcastically) I want you to kill someone.

Rai: Alrighty! (disappears)

Gills: Hey-wha-how?

Rai: (appears out of thin air, holding Katnappe's dead body) Done.

Gills: Ever heard of SARCASM!

Rai: Oops. Oh well. (chucks the body into a river)

Kim: That's our drinking water!

Ny: Of all the idiotic things…

Dojo: We're all gonna die!

Clay: We can find another river ya' half brain.

Omi: Correct. Let us start searching.

Chase: Search no more! There is one over there! (points to a river behind him)

Everyone: AH!

Gills: How long have you been here!

Chase: This whole time. Did you not notice me. Am I unnoticeable, like JACK SPICER! NOOOO!

Omi: It may have had something to do with that very large tree you just fell out of.

Ny: Uh…DUH!

Kim: What were you doing in that tree anyway.

Chase: I wanted to see if my hair would touch the ground.

Rai:…Huh?

Dojo: Didn't see that coming.

Gills: Um…guys…?

Ny: What now?

Gills: We're about to be crushed.

-BAM!-

Clay: Great! Just great! We got smashed by a rock!

Omi: At least my head is still round.

Rai: Why are we not dead?

Ny: Well, if you take the mass of the rock, multiply it by the circumference of Omi's head, and then divide that by the first 400 digits of pi, plus two…

Gills: In other words, the rock is too big to kill us.

Kim: What!

Chase: It's true. Billy's 15th law of physics says so.

Ny: Billy took away my author powers…

Rai: HELP!

-The rock crumbles to pieces-

Clay: Much better.

Ny: Gills?

Gills: Yes?

Ny: This is all your fault you know.

Everyone but Gills: DIE!

-------------------------

AN: Sorry it took so long again. My homework hates me. I am sorry to inform you that this will be the last chapter of this story. I'm just starting to get bored with it, you know? But I will start another series in about a month containing randomness and all that good stuff. Still need to finish that second chapter for Unrealized Love…I'll get to work on that! BYE!


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